One of my neighbours recently commented (from further than the mandated social distance) that it must be so hard for me having nothing to do as I am usually so busy. I said that I was actually busy decorating (which is normally obvious because I look like I have been in an explosion in a paint factory). The response was along the lines of “but after that” and it made me think that perhaps people underestimate the scale of the task.
The walls alone amount to 90 m² of real estate and need (or have had) a minimum of 2 coats. Being an elderly pub there is also a distinct lack of anything true, square or stable. Nearly 6 kg of filler has gone into this exercise and today the dreaded ‘window of doom’ resulted in me having to go old school and deploy newspaper to try and fill the acres of void. You kinda know its a a big job for filler alone when you drop your scraper into the hole and have to fish it out!
When the walls are finished there are ceilings to paint (if paint is available by then). Before anyone reminds me that one should start at the top when decorating let me remind you that paint is currently as rare as open pubs and also ceilings can be slotted in around trading hours. The floor and the deck still need doing as do all the windows, so don’t worry my 12 hour days will continue well into reopening.
I am sure we have all noticed oddities in the current situation but let me share two that I have witnessed recently. The first involves queuing outside of the small store in town. There were 2 people in the queue in front of me and about 4 behind me when one person left and the young girl ushered one person in. As luck would have it the guy at the front was waiting for the person who had just exited so this put me in pole position.
A minute or so later, with nobody else exiting the store, said girl ushered us in “you can all come in now”. I confess to being bemused as to what had happened between me not being able to enter and then everybody being allowed in. I did think that it may not have been pandemic related, perhaps somebody had gone into labour or maybe monsters had to be trapped? Perhaps they were relaying the hopscotch markings on the floor? I made the effort to check the entire store (it is not large) and nothing seemed amiss, damn they are good!
The second oddity is speaking to the guy in the chip shop on the corner who was stood patiently waiting for passing trade (they don’t do deliveries). The apparent innocence when he noted ‘it’s dead out there’ made me wonder if there is some alternate news source that is telling people life is back to normal. The fact that the government are telling people to stay at home at every opportunity appears to have completely missed the poor fella.
As I type this I have left Gav duck in charge of Henry who is complaining that his share of the workload is currently excessive. Apparently he never signed up for working the sort of shifts he is currently on and resents the term ‘key worker’ as he doesn’t want to come out, he just wants to get back in the cupboard.
I have tried the ‘all in this together’ chat and he just pointed to the ducks getting drunk every night. Gav duck is currently enforcing some social distancing for Henry as he is the only one large enough to defeat an attack. Meanwhile Terry and Sausage ducks are still grinning about my earlier discovery.
I had noted that the vinyl wall paint is quite a nuisance and often looks patchy even after the second coat. In part this can be attributed to rushed, rubbish or just lazy painting but it also seems to change by time of day. I have noticed that some areas that looked great in light then spring a light patch in the dark. This morning I noticed a patch of red that looked light and made a mental note to grab the red roller whilst muttering that I am sure I have already hit this patch.
It was a couple of hours later that I got around to touching this area up and low and behold I could not find it. I studied the wall from every angle and it was fine. It would appear that what I am seeing, in paint blinded state, is reflection from a rough surface. Hence I now have the ducks in fits of hilarity that I have been chasing my arse trying to paint over bloody shadows!