I could never be accused of being a follower of fashion and so it is that only this weekend can I say that I have joined the slow cooker revolution. The particular device that I have purchased emits a blue glow when in operation which I think is rather fitting given that it is more ornament than use. I purchased the slow cooker because everybody tells me that it is amazing, well that is what I said but in truth it’s a gadget so I could hardly resist could I. The conclusions of a beer fuelled discussion a week ago left me convinced that all I need to do is add flour, eggs, beef and vegetables on Monday and come home on Friday to a roast dinner, what a truly amazing machine. If this doesn’t work then I will have to speak to Marc and see if he has a different model to me.
As a single man, home at the weekend only the slow cooker is probably one of the most pointless purchases that I have made. Should I choose to produce a slow cooked meal it will be ready on Saturday night when I will meet it with a take-away purchased on the way home from the pub! The one thing that I want to cook in the slow cooker is pulled pork, I am not sure why. The interesting thing is that all of the people who I speak to who have a slow cooker agree that this is on the wish list but not one of them has cooked it. My prediction is one or two meals before the machine ends up at the back of the cupboard I will, of course, report back in due course.
My slow cooker was dropped off on Saturday but when I unpackaged it I discovered a large dent. A quick call to the very helpful retailer resulted in an exchange scheduled for Sunday. Whilst scheduling the redelivery the sales agent enquired as to what the purpose of a slow cooker was since he had no idea and they were selling a lot. I explained that it was essentially a device to cook pulled pork and some other stuff but slowly so you could start it when you went to work and dinner would be ready when you got home “oh like a reverse microwave” was the excellent summary. On Sunday the 4 hr delivery window dropped to 2 hrs as promised with my slot being 3 pm to 5 pm, here it went wrong. At 5pm there was no sign and at 5.20 I went to the pub, when 6pm passed it was clearly not going to arrive. At 6.15 I got a call from the logistics company to tell me that they were outside and there was nobody in, not bloody surprising given that they were over an hour late was my response.
I walked home in full preparation for an angry exchange with the delivery drivers, after all this was an exchange because the first part was damaged and they were late. As we walked up to my flat the driver explained that they had been delayed because a fridge freezer delivery had necessitated a door removal. When the bloke turned round and said “look at that mate” I saw a large tear in the thigh of his trousers “bloody dog went for me when I was holding the door”. Anger quickly changed to sympathy as I noted that a front door was a particularly effective weapon for dealing with nasty little dogs.
Other gadget news is not so good this weekend; I have had to send my beloved BlackBerry away for repair. Having firstly checked that the address on the returns label was indeed in England I backed up and wiped my phone before posting it into the abyss. Calls are diverted to my works cell but this doesn’t and of course you can’t divert SMS. I sent a message to recent contacts explaining my telephonic predicament before wiping my phone and when the phone restarted there were numerous messages attempting to discuss the situation. Because the phone was wiped I had no idea who these people were, they were just random numbers, who thought the logical thing to do when receiving a message that I wouldn’t have that cell for a while was to respond to it.
This morning found me travelling, not a long distance, I am swapping my Essex coast for St’Austell for a couple of days on business. My timing is typical Gav in that at the end of this week they are due to open the rail line at Dawlish. Having spent some time weighing up the torturous rail/bus route and the equally unappealing one flight a day from Gatwick I decided upon the latter option. As you all know I am a seasoned traveller and so this weekend I packed the flight bag rather than the domestic one. For some reason this morning I wasn’t entirely comfortable, something seemed wrong. Because I am away every week I have long since grown out of the silly “did I turn the gas off” and “did I lock the door” routines. A quick check of my pockets revealed the only things that you ever actually need: a passport and credit card. A further exploration revealed that the folding pocket knife that accompanies me almost everywhere was indeed safely at home, I do hate throwing them in those bins at the airport.
So what was it that had set me ever so slightly on edge this morning? Suddenly it dawned on me; there was no itinerary from the BB travel manager, no E tickets and no twitter feed confirming travel conditions. Not having the BlackBerry feels odd, like a PA has taken a week off and not sourced cover; it all just feels a bit disorganised. I know that the repair is a quick one and I am hoping that my phone reaches the top of the pile quickly. Not only do I need my Berry back to run my life but I can stop sending garbage replies to people on the irritating Samsung touch screen!