For those of you that use the metro, whether regularly or occasionally, please remind yourselves of the rules. The rules are simple and sensible, if we all remember them then travelling becomes a lot easier.
1 – There is only one speed and that speed is fast. This is not a museum trip or an art gallery, keep moving.
They put maps on the wall for a reason, if you need to consult one stand to one side. The pocket map/smartphone app/ guidebook is not for use in the middle of the concourse.
2 – The words “seek assistance” are self explanatory, do as they say. Feeding your dog eared ticket through the reader multiple times will not change the result.
3 – There is a time for stopping it’s when you arrive. Do not stop in the middle of a crowd, there is no reason to and the result is likely to hurt.
4 – You cannot multi-task. Male or female, young or old you cannot, please accept this simple fact. You can’t use your smartphone, camera, makeup or anything else whilst walking.
5 – We’re all going the same way. Crowds work like this, if you decide you want to go another way then tough. A busy metro is not the place to stylishly defer yourself, go with the flow at all times.
6 – Use the seats. It’s not a marriage proposal, if the seat becomes vacant sit on it somebody else wants to stand where you are.
7 – Deodorant is mandatory. Your partner may like pheromones but they don’t work on public transport. I won’t vomit on you if you don’t suffocate me in body odour, deal?
8 – The announcer/signs are correct. I know that there is a lot of fraud out there but station announcements have not succumbed yet. When they say there are no trains from platform X there really aren’t, save a walk and just believe them.
9 – There is a fare system not a barter system, accept it. No matter how many options you give the ticket clerk or what your mother saw on the web, that is the price, pay it.