Travelling by public transport provides a fertile landscape for the blog. Today was a leisure journey, they opened the station that I wanted yesterday. Firstly I have to say that,as always, I had a personal battle to leave the sun drenched coast and head into town but needs must.
The young ticket office clerk was first on the list of observations. He was rather worried that he had an audit earlier and was ten pounds short. Step in the reassuring words of Gav “well it’s all innocent so you will be ok, after all probably looks odder if your always bang on”. I won’t go into the detail of the conversation suffice it to say that I left him more worried about his impeccable record being misconstrued than he was of his short today. This you see is why I don’t try to help people are just so complicated.
I have to offer a public apology to the elderly couple who boarded the train at frinton. They appeared to be heading home from a weekend away but they had packed for a month. The fella boarded the train, gave an almighty heave on his case and launched back out of the door as if gripped by some powerful monster. Obviously I checked for zombies, after all frinton is the retirement capital of Essex so it would be a natural breeding ground for the living dead. In fact with some subtle makeup they could be there already.
Having concluded that it was not yet appropriate to go into full zombie apocalypse mode and start attacking people I defaulted to mirth. Having watched this elderly guy battle his case into the train I expected him to assist his wife. I was wrong, he found a seat and took a load off. She had learnt from his experience and took a wrestling stance. I have to say that this,as a tug of war, beat even the pub challenge at home. She wrestled and the case fought back, for some time it was anyone’s victory but she clinched it in the fifth round. At no point did her husband help, doubtless he was suitably chided by his own battle.
My apology is for not assisting. I would blame my aching wrists and knee but in truth it was just too funny.
My observations are not limited to fellow passengers. As we sat at kirby I watched that which is responsible for so much of the NHS workload. Yes, you guessed, old man DIY. In fact it’s unfair to blame age so let’s call it amateur DIY. Our man was cleaning guttering, having long ago departed his ladder he was balancing on ridge tiles. This is the point that we all reach where we know we can push just a little further after all its so much easier than moving the ladder.
During my time in hospital one of my neighbours had shattered his heel on such an efficiency drive. Take a minute to savour that phrase ‘shattered heel’ before we continue. This fella had fallen off his ladder having admitted that he overextended, unfortunately he landed in a standing pose. My hospital neighbours story was all the better for the fact that he spent some 6 hours laying in the lawn, his wife even went out shopping. When I met her she laughed and said it was only when he didn’t come in for tea she realised that he had been too long.
I know what you’re thinking, how do I know that this wasn’t a builder with a day off? Am I ageist or judging by appearances? Well I guess I am a little guilty of the later but our man was on the first floor roof wearing slippers! Natural selection anybody?
Honourable mention today to Dave and Jo. Dave I am looking forward to getting back on form and having a proper giggle bro. And Jo thanks for the kind words when the light goes dim sis.
